Safe Distance
by G550
Summary: While working a case, Emily comes very close to being killed by the Unsub. For her, it's business as usual. But for Hotch, it's something else entirely. Hotch/Prentiss
1. Chapter 1

The usual disclaimers. I do not own Criminal Minds or any of its characters.

* * *

><p>Hotch and Prentiss stood outside the abandoned barn, listening for any sign that the Unsub was inside. He had escaped custody two weeks ago, leaving two dead little girls in his wake. The most recent abduction had been less than 24 hours before, and there was still hope.<p>

"I thought I heard something." she said anxiously. "We have to go in, now."

Hotch shook his head.

"I didn't hear anything. We have to wait for backup."

"That little girl doesn't have time for us to wait for back up. God only knows what he's doing to her right now..."

"Prentiss, I said ..."

There was a muffled scream from help from inside.

"That, I heard." he stated. "I'll go around back. You take the front."

She nodded that she understood, and he was gone into the darkness. Slowly she opened the door, holding her weapon out in front of her, glancing quickly from side to side. She stopped, waiting for something that would tell her which way to go. Hearing what she thought was the little girl again, she moved toward the sound, through a horse stall area. She flicked her light around and caught a glimpse of the child, who was gagged and tied to a chair. Her eyes were wide, and she motioned wildly to the ceiling with her head. It was too late. By the time Prentiss tilted her head to look, the unsub had jumped off the rafter, landing squarely on her back. Her gun was knocked away, and just out of her reach. Pushing his knee into her back, and with one hand on the back of her head, the unsub shoved her forcefully into the ground.

"It's a shame we don't have more time." he growled. "The things I could do to you."

"I'm a little old for you, don't you think?" she shot back.

As Prentiss struggled angrily, he raised his arm, knife in hand, prepared to end her life. Before he could even start the downward swing, a shot rang out, hitting him square in the forehead. His eyes opened wide just for a minute, the knife dropped to the ground, and he slumped over. Dead.

Hotch rushed over, shoving the unsub off of her.

"Prentiss, are you all right?"

"Yeah..." she said, struggling to get to her feet. "Thanks to you."

It was the only exchange they had, before completely turning their attention to the little girl in the chair. She was crying hysterically, as they tried to get her untied. None of them even noticed Morgan and Reid coming up behind them.

"What the hell happened?"

"Morgan..." Hotch said while making sure the man had no pulse. "We got him, the girl is ok"

"You should have waited for back up"

"There wasn't time."

"Hotch we were three minutes behind you! You couldn't wait three minutes?"

Hotch ignored him, instead looking over toward Prentiss, just now realizing how close she had come to being killed. Her lip was bleeding, and her forehead was scuffed from being shoved in to the ground. Nothing life threatening. Still, it was literally a matter of seconds that had decided between her life and death. There was a tightness in his chest, and a feeling of panic rising inside him that he couldn't quite understand. He prided himself on never getting too low, or too high - keeping emotions in check and on an even keel. What was so different about what happened in the last five minutes that seemed to affect him this way?

"Hotch, you okay?"

Her voice brought him out of his trance, and he realized he just needed to get out of that barn. And clear his head.

"I'm fine. Have JJ call the parents."

And with that, he strode out of the building, and out towards the vehicles.

It was a victory. They were few and far between these days, and the team had decided to get together that night for a celebration of sorts. Really, it was just a way to decompress before going home. Prentiss was the last to arrive, having wanted to change her somewhat bloody clothes before she went out. She found them sitting at a table in the back, but as her eyes scanned over them, she realized someone was missing.

"About time you got here, girl," Garcia shouted when she saw her. "You're two drinks behind!"

"Where's Hotch? Didn't he come with you?"

Morgan glanced around. He had not even realized that the boss man was not around.

"Not really sure." he said, taking a swig from his beer bottle. "He went to the bar to get a drink, but come to think of it, he's been gone quite a while. Anyway, sit down, we'll get the waitresses attention."

"I think I'll head over there." she gestured towards the bar "and see what's keeping Hotch."

Morgan shrugged, as if to say "suit yourself" and went back to watching the ladies sitting at the next table.

The bar was crowded, and it took her awhile to work her way through. She looked around, but didn't see Hotch anywhere. He had acted strangely the entire time on the jet, not wanting to talk to anyone. Instead he had kept his nose in a file, using it as a buffer. He was always silent and brooding, but there was just something different. And it didn't make sense. This was the best possible ending that they could have hoped for, yet he didn't seem to even realize it.

Prentiss ordered herself a beer, and leaned back against the bar, again scanning the area. Finally, she noticed him. He was sitting down at a corner booth, staring in to the glass in front of him. She watched him for a few minutes before walking over, as if trying to figure out what was going on in his head.

"Hotch?"

He had been completely zoned out, and he tried not to act startled.

"Prentiss." his eyes immediately went to her wounds. "Are you all right?"

"What? This?" she asked, motioning to her forehead. "This is nothing. Just some minor war wounds."

He looked away.

"It's not nothing."

She slid into the booth opposite him, trying to get him to make eye contact.

"Hotch what's going on here? You should be celebrating. We saved that girl's life, and the doctors said there wasn't even any sign of abuse."

"We should have waited for back up."

"You wanted to wait, I pushed you to go in there."

"I shouldn't have agreed. It's my job to be objective and follow procedure."

"If we had followed procedure, that girl would probably be dead right now."

"You don't know that."

"Where is this coming from? Is this because Morgan questioned you back there? Because, really, Hotch, he's the last person to..."

"This isn't about Morgan." he said, finally meeting her eyes. "You could have been killed tonight, Emily."

"But I wasn't."

"Five seconds later and I would have been too late."

"Hotch, we put our lives on the line every time we go out on a case. This was nothing different. It was a close call, that's all."

He shook his head, and raised the glass to his lips, quickly downing the contents.

"Look, the team is wondering where you went. Let's go join them, at least for one drink, and get your mind off of whatever is bothering you."

He was going to protest, but he knew it was useless. He made a conscious decision to push his troubling thoughts out of his mind. It had been an emotional case, and maybe all he needed was to go home and get a good nights sleep. Things would be much clearer to him in the morning. Or so he hoped.

He stood up and gestured for her to lead the way.

"All right." he relented. "One drink."


	2. Chapter 2

Hotch had stayed long enough to convince Prentiss that all was well, and then he had said his goodbyes. He walked through the door to his apartment, tossing his keys on the table and contemplating having another drink. It was Friday night, and Jessica would not be bringing Jack back until the next morning, so what could it hurt? He filled a glass, and threw himself on the couch, sighing heavily. Whatever this was that he was feeling, he had to put a stop to it.

He stared at the liquid in the glass, as if it would give him answers. Unfortunately, it only appeared to be filled with questions. Running the events of the past few months through his mind, he suddenly realized something. In the recent past, he had paired himself in the field with Prentiss on every single case. Was it his subconscious mind's way of keeping her close? Was he just worried about her because of the previous events with Doyle, or was it something more?

He downed the contents of the glass, and decided to sleep this whole thing off. It would be better in the morning. It would be forgotten.

Only it wasn't.

[*] [*] [*] [*] [*]

Prentiss walked into the office early Monday morning, surprised to see the light on in Hotch's office. She hoped that his early arrival didn't mean they had a new case already. The last one had been rather draining, even if she didn't want to admit it, and some down time would be nice. Knowing the rest of the team would arrive soon, she made her way up to his office. After the strange way he was acting after the last case on Friday, she just wanted to make sure that he was back to "normal".

Hotch wasn't even aware that she was standing at the door way watching him, which she found odd. Usually he could sense things like that. His eyes were surrounded by black circles as he furiously worked at his paperwork. Something was definitely off with him. Emily tapped on the door frame, calling his name softly as she did.

"Hotch?"

Startled, he looked up from the documents that he was working on.

"Prentiss...how long have you been standing there?" he glanced at his watch. "Aren't you a little early?"

"Yeah, I uh..." she shifted a little uneasily. "I was hoping you would be here. I just wanted to make sure you were okay? You know, you were pretty...upset on Friday."

"I was."

His eyes were locked with hers, and he he didn't like the feelings that were coming to the surface again.

"Hotch, like I said, it was really nothing..."

He waved her off, trying to deflect.

"I'm sorry about that. I'm fine now. It's just that...well cases with kids, they affect me more than they probably should. You would think i would be immune by now. And sometimes I just need a little while to deal with it."

'_I usually just don't let any of you see it' _ he thought to himself, but didn't say out loud

"Oh." she said in a sympathetic tone. "I didn't even think of that. It's probably because of Jack."

"I suppose."

"But Hotch, I gotta say, you look a little...rough. Are you sure you've really gotten past it?"

He chuckled slightly.

"I imagine I do. Jack had the flu all weekend. Poor guy was pretty sick, and neither one of us got much sleep."

"Oh that's too bad, is he better now?"

"He's fine now. Just a 24 hour bug."

Emily felt bad that Jack had been sick, but she was relieved that there was some explanation for Hotch's haggard look. It was selfish, she knew, but she missed the stoic figure that he had become to her. He had been through so much in the years that she knew him...the average person would have buckled under such stress, but not Hotch. No matter how bad things would get, she would feel comforted by that strength of his. The look that she had seen in his eyes after the last case...well it scared her. She thought maybe he was finally breaking. She had probably picked up her phone a dozen times over the weekend, wanting to text him, but had decided that would be crossing a line, and it was better left alone.

"Prentiss? Is there something else?"

She had not even realized how lost in thought she was. How long had she been just standing there?

"No...I'm uh, going to get some coffee. You want some?"

"That would be great." he smiled. "Just take it to the conference room table, though. As soon as the rest of the team gets here, we have to go over another case."

"Not another one." she groaned.

"Just consulting right now." he assured her.

"Great." she smiled, turning to walk out. "See you there."

As soon as she was gone, he let out a heavy breath and threw his pen down at the desk. What was happening to him? He stood, moving to the window and lifting one section of the blinds to watch her walk away.

He had told her the truth, Jack had been sick, but there was much more to it than that. Emily Prentiss had invaded his mind for most of the weekend. What he was feeling, well, he hadn't felt it since...ever. Maybe he had felt something similar, when he and Haley had first gotten together. There was that initial excitement and euphoria that was a part of every new relationship. And as was normal, it had faded, but he still loved her, right up until her dying day. It was never there with Beth, and that's what made him end the relationship. Hotch cared about Beth, he really did, but there was something missing, even if he didn't know quite what it was.

But now, he knew exactly what it was that he had been missing.

He shook his head. No. He spent all weekend trying to force these feelings back into remission, and while Jack's illness had given him a bit of a distraction, he knew now that he had not been successful. There was nothing to indicate that Prentiss returned any of these feelings. And even if she did, it would jeopardize both of their careers and he was not going to let that happen. There was only one way to handle this. He had to limit contact with her as much as possible, until he could find a way to deal with it. There would be no morning coffees, or talks on the plane. And no more teaming himself up with her on cases. He was going to keep himself as far away from her as possible, without making it too obvious, of course.

There, he thought. Problem solved.

"Hey, didn't want it to get cold. And you sure looked like you need the caffeine."

He turned to see Emily holding two cups of coffee, with a big beautiful smile on her face.

"Thanks." he smiled back, taking the cup from her hand.

Damn it. This was going to be harder than he thought.


	3. Chapter 3

Kind of a transition chapter. Bear with me. As always, I own nothing.

Hotch had been true to his word. As difficult as it was, it had to be done. Three cases had gone by and each time, he had been sure to pair Emily off with one of the other members of the team. On one hand, it bothered him not be with her, to not be able to protect her and keep her safe, but on the other...it was just how it had to be. And now that there was emotional involvement, she was probably safer that way. Being over protective, worrying more about her than catching the unsub, was a distraction. And in the field, distraction could prove fatal.

The other part of the self imposed distance was not so easy. Emily was so used to sliding into the seat opposite him on the plane, sometimes talking about the case, mostly asking about Jack or some other light hearted conversation. Since there was no way to avoid it, the best he could do was to act disinterested - give her short, yes or no answers and bury his nose in a file. He knew she didn't understand, and that it was probably hurting her feelings, but what could he do? Every time she smiled at him now, it affected him more than he would like to admit.

They had caught another case, the 4th in a month, and everyone was both mentally and physically exhausted. It was another child abduction case, this time in Roanoke Virginia. Knowing that time was critical, they chose to go right to the plane, having Garcia brief them while they were enroute. There had been no ransom demand, or communication of any kind up to this point. They bantered about possible motives, the father was a Judge handling mostly family cases, and the mother was a school teacher. They wrapped it up quickly, as they were about to land.

'Okay,' Hotch said, closing the file in front of him. "Reid, you and Morgan go the school where the child was taken, see what you can find out there. Interview the kids. Somebody must have seen something. Dave, you and Prentiss interview the family. Find out if the Judge has ever gotten any threats, no matter how trivial they seem. JJ and I will go to the local police department and see if they've uncovered anything. They seem to feel the family is being less than forthcoming about some details."

He glanced quickly at Prentiss, and saw her raise an eyebrow and tilt her head just a little, as if she was confused about something. Quickly averting his eyes, he began to gather up the files in front of him. When he looked back up, he saw that she was still staring at him, but then she got up and followed Rossi towards the exit. Sighing heavily, he shut his briefcase and ushered JJ out in front of him.

It only took two days to not only solve to the case, but recover the girl alive. How it was all going to end, however, was still up in the air. As it turned out, the Judge's wife was unable to have children, and he had actually blackmailed a defendant into allowing him to adopt her newborn child. The mother was a drug addict and a dealer, and he had taken advantage. Instead of jail time, they had negotiated a back room adoption, and sent the mother away to rehab. Years later, when she got her life in order, she had come back for both her child and for revenge.

Hotch was grateful that it was a short flight back to Quantico, knowing full well what was waiting for him on that plane. Immediately he leaned his head back and closed his eyes, hoping that she would take the hint. He heard her slip into the seat across from him.

"Hotch? You got a minute?"

Well that plan hadn't worked.

"Prentiss... is there a problem?"

"Well I don't know, that's what I was going to ask you."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know, it just seems like you've been...avoiding me."

"I'm not sure I understand."

"Come on, Hotch. We used to talk, and not just about the cases. We used to have coffee, and we haven't been in the field together in weeks. I kind of miss that. Did I do something to cause this?"

"That's what this is about? Prentiss, you're reading too much into this. I've had a lot on my mind lately."

"So let's talk about." she said, leaning forward, gesturing with her arms. "What is it that has you so distracted? Is it Jack?"

"No," he sighed. "It's not Jack. Would you please just let it go? This just isn't something that I want to discuss with you, or anyone right now for that matter. And as for not pairing on cases, we've always done that on a bit of a rotation basis. I base my decision on what I think is best with each individual case. I really don't need you to be questioning me on this."

It was a much more stern voice than he had intended, and he regretted it immediately. He quickly tried to form an apology, but she was already getting up from her seat.

"Prentiss, wait.."

"No, you're right, Hotch. I won't bring it up again."

He turned and watched her disappear behind him, to join the others towards the back of the plane. This was not how he wanted things to go. Yes, he needed to keep his feelings buried, but the last thing he wanted to do was hurt her in the process. There had to be a happy medium, and he would have to find it. But right now he just had to find a way to fix things. Emily Prentiss was pissed off at him.

Prentiss threw herself into the seat across from JJ, letting out a groan of frustration as she did.

"Did you talk to Hotch?"

"Ha. I tried."

"Well what did he say?"

"There's something going on. But he has no intention of discussing it with me. He basically told me to butt out. Oh, and and he's the king and I should not question his authority."

"What? You sure you're not paraphrasing just a little?"

Emily smirked and sighed. "Okay, maybe a little. But whatever is going on, he definitely doesn't want to talk about it.

"It's probably just some problems with Jack. Or maybe Beth."

"No, they split up months ago."

"Really? How did the rest of us not know that?"

"See that's just what I mean, Jayje. We used to talk about everything, from Jack to Beth, to comparing our past demons. I realize he's the boss man, but I thought he was also my friend. "

She knew that she was starting to sound like a jilted school girl, but she couldn't help it.

"Emily, cut him a break. He's always got the weight of the world on his shoulders, along with Strauss breathing down his neck, and maybe it's just getting to him a little."

"I guess it's possible..."

It was late when they got back to Quantico, and everyone had stopped in the office just long enough to grab their things before heading home. Hotch, as always, was working late in his office. He was attempting to finish up the paperwork, but his mind was elsewhere. He looked out through the blinds, and saw Emily grabbing some things from her desk, obviously ready to leave. He had to try and make this right.

"Emily," he called from outside of his office, "Can I see you a minute please?"

She looked up at him, and it was obvious that she was still a bit irritated. She really didn't want to have a repeat of the conversation on the plane, but it was only going to get worse if she walked out. She threw up her hands as if to say "why not?" and walked up the stops to his office.

Hotch was already seated behind his desk, still pretending to be working on the file, when she came through the door.

"You wanted to see me, Sir?"

He almost visibly cringed at her use of the word "Sir" in that tone.

"Have a seat."

"I'll stand if it's ok with you."

He shook his head. He guessed that he deserved this attitude he was getting, but that didn't mean he had to like it.

"Look, Prentiss, I'm sorry about what I said on the plane. I'm also sorry for acting distant for the last month, but it's just a problem that I have to deal with on my own. It has me a bit...stressed."

She reached out quickly, touching his arm, something that definitely didn't go unnoticed.

"Hotch, you're not sick are you? Is anything wrong?"

"No, no, nothing like that." he smiled, glancing at her hand that was touching him. "It's really nothing for you or any of the team to worry about. And I promise you, if I decided I need to talk about this, I will come to you."

"You were just so short with me all of the time, I thought maybe I did something to piss you off. But I've wracked my brain and can't figure out what it could be."

"I assure you, it's nothing you've done, and I apologize for being so cold with you. How can I make it up to you?"

Emily glanced down at the now empty bull pen.

"Well it looks like I could use a ride home. It seems JJ has left without me."

Hotch glanced down at the folder on his desk, then back up at Prentiss. With a nod, he threw the papers into the file, and shoved it all in his briefcase. It was just a simple car ride, there was no reason he couldn't handle this.

"I don't want to make you late to pick up Jack, though."

He smiled. "It's already too late for Jack. I'm picking him up in the morning."

Hotch reached around and shut off the light, throwing on a light coat and gesturing for her to lead the way.

"Great. Then we can stop for beer and a pizza. I'm starved."

"Uh ok...sure." he said, as he locked the office door behind. them.

Now what had he gotten himself into?


	4. Chapter 4

Hotch followed Prentiss in the bar, taking note of the dark and dingy surroundings. It had been a long time since he had been in a dive like this, and he suddenly felt very overdressed. When they reached the table, he removed his jacket and tossed it around the back of the chair.

"_This_ is where you get the best pizza in town?"

"I know what you're thinking, Hotch, but just give this place a chance. You'll thank me for it later."

'Uh-huh." he smirked, reaching for the menu.

"No, you don't need that. I've been craving this pizza all week."

At that moment, a waitress stopped by the table, and Hotch could tell they were familiar with each other.

"Yeah, we'll take a large pizza with pepperoni, mushrooms, onions and anchovies..." she glanced up at Hotch, and seeing the face he was making quickly amended the order. 'Make that half with anchovies, and a pitcher of draft beer."

"Sure thing hon. We've been wondering where you've been lately. Good to see you again." she leaned down to whisper in her ear "And I'm glad to see you brought some company this time."

After she left, they started making small talk about everything ranging from Jack and his soccer games to to the construction outside of Quantico. Emily was relieved, it was starting to feel normal again, like the last month had not even happened. She hadn't seen him smile this much in months. She knew that something was still bothering him, but he was obviously pushing it aside and relaxing so she wasn't going to bring it up again. Neither even seemed to notice the tall dark haired man coming up behind them. He sported a weathered leather jacket, and a nice scar above his right eye. Without warning, Emily felt a hand on her shoulder and instantly the hairs on her neck stood up. Of all the gin joints in all the world...

"Emily Prentiss...so nice to see you. How long has it been?"

She didn't even have to turn around, she recognized that thick New York accent right away.

"Not long enough." she mumbled and twisted to try and get away from his touch.

"You know, I was going to call you, really I was." she could hear the barely restrained anger in his voice. "Funny thing, that number you gave me...it was for the Chinese Restaurant on 38th street. And I thought to myself, it must be a mistake, because why would Emily give me the wrong number?"

"Probably because she didn't want to to talk to you, did you ever consider that?" Hotch said sternly, giving him the signature glare.

"Who the hell are you?"

"I'm SSA Aaron Hotchner with the FBI. And I think you need to leave."

"Ha." he scoffed. "Am I supposed to be impressed with that? Are you going to flash you badge too?"

"I don't need my badge to take care of the likes of you." Hotch said, getting to his feet.

"Whoa, whoa guys..." Emily said, trying to diffuse the situation. "Eddie, aren't you already on suspension from the force? I don't think you need any more trouble right now."

"You think I'm afraid of _HIM_?"

"I think you're drunk and need to back off."

His fists were clenched and his jaw was tight. Emily could see the anger building behind his eyes, but to her surprise he seemed to give up. Almost too easily.

"Yeah, okay." he said, his tone still angry "We can settle this next time."

"There's not going to be a next time, Eddie." she said in a dismissive tone.

"Yeah. We'll see. When your guard dog here is not around." he grumbled, then turned and walked back towards the bar.

Hotch let out a heavy breath and sat back down, still glaring in Eddie's direction.

"Friend of yours?" he asked sarcastically, trying to break the tension.

"A very bad blind date. A friend of mine at the state department set me up with him. Said we were a perfect match. Not sure what that means she thinks of me..."

The waitress returned, placing a pitcher of beer and two frosted glasses in front of them. When she was gone, Hotch grabbed the pitcher and started filling the mugs.

"So what happened?"

"Nothing really." she answered while taking a rather long sip of beer. "But not for his lack of trying. He's one arrogant SOB, and he's got one hell of a temper, especially when things don't go his way."

"So he's one of the 'worse than Viper guys, huh?"

"What?"

"When we were working that one case, you said you had dated guys worse than Viper."

"Oh," she was surprised that he even remembered the conversation. "Yeah, he's one who qualifies. i don't know what it is, sometimes it seems like that's the only type of guy I manage to attract."

_If she only knew,_ he thought_. _

For the first time that night, there was an uncomfortable silence, and Emily took that as her cue.

"You know, the pizza will be here any minute. I'm just going to the ladies room to wash my hands." she said, pushing her chair back. "And don't you start eating without me."

"I won't." he smiled.

His eyes followed her as she walked towards the restrooms in the back of the bar, and then turned briefly towards the obnoxious jerk that had been harassing her. He was downing shots, and talking rather loudly with the drunks around him. Hotch wished he had gone with his first instinct and thrown him right out of the place - literally - but he didn't want to embarrass Emily. She was obviously somewhat of a regular here, and he also knew that she was perfectly capable of taking care of herself.

Part of him knew that he was crazy to put himself in this position. When they were in the office or out in the field, it was much easier to control the situation. Sure, they had been out together before, but always with the rest of the team. This was different. This was a side of Emily that he always suspected was there, but never really got to see. And he liked it. He felt those feeling creeping up in his chest again, and whether it was the exhaustion setting in, or the alcohol, he just didn't feel like fighting them right now.

The waitress came back, interrupting his thoughts, and slid the pizza on the table in front of Hotch. He had to admit, it smelled heavenly.

"And here's a couple of plates and some silverware. Anything else I can get you dear?"

"No, I think we're good, thanks."

"Ok, well if you need anything else, just holler. "

Until he smelled that pizza, he hadn't even realize how hungry he was. Thinking back, he realized it had been over 12 hours since had anything to eat. He snagged a slice, tossing it on his plate. He wasn't sure how long he could hold out without eating, so he glanced up to see if she was on her way back. His heart stopped for a minute. Not only did he not see Emily, but a quick glance around the room told him that Eddie had suddenly disappeared as well. In a flash, he pushed his chair back and practically ran to the back of the bar.


	5. Chapter 5

He was relieved when he didn't see Eddie anywhere around, but he still just had a bad feeling. That feeling was confirmed when he heard a mans voice shouting from behind the restroom door. Without thinking, he kicked the door open to find Eddie attempting to pin Emily up against the wall. Hotch lunged at him, grabbing the back of his shirt with both hands, spinning him around and slamming him up against the sink. Eddie let out a groan of pain and attempted a punch that missed his mark. Hotch was gearing up for a swing of his own, when he heard Emily yell.

"Hotch, No!"

The sound of her voice stopped him mid swing, a conditioned response from their time together in the field. He knew by the tone of her voice that something was wrong. It almost sounded like fear. He turned to look at her, and saw the anxious look in her eyes. It took a minute to register what she was thinking. He released Eddie forcefully, causing him to fall to the ground.

"You sonofabitch, I could have you charged for this!" he yelled from the floor. "I was just talking to her and that was an unprovoked assault!"

About that time, one of the stall doors opened and a woman appeared.

"I saw the whole thing through the crack in the door. You were trying to attack this lady. And I'd be more than happy to tell that to the police what I saw."

Hotch breathed in deeply to regain his composure.

"Get out."

"What?"

"I said get out. And if you come near Emily again, I will use my resources to look so deeply into your past, that you suspension will be permanent. Guys like you, Eddie, they always seem to have lots of secrets to hide. You can kiss your career and your pension goodbye. Do we understand each other?"

Three to four seconds passed as the two men glared at each other. Eventually, Eddie gathered himself up from the floor and stormed out the door.

"You okay?" he asked quietly.

"Yeah. Yeah, Hotch but I could have handled that myself."

"I know you can take care of yourself, Prentiss. But I just..."

"I'm not some fragile doll that you have to protect."

She was clearly irritated, but Hotch figured it had more to do with everything that had just transpired than anything that he had done.

"I'm sorry." he whispered.

"Look, it's over." she said, waving him off. "And now I'm really starving. So let's go eat that pizza."

Emily knew she had over reacted and felt bad, but didn't want to discuss it. He nodded and opened the door, following her back to the table. He only managed to eat one piece, but he couldn't help but smile as he watched her eat slice after slice. He knew they had to talk about what happened, but he was trying to allow time for the emotions to subside before he broached the subject. He signaled the waitress for another pitcher of beer, which she promptly brought them.

"It's kind of late, Hotch. You sure you have time for another beer?"

"We have to talk." he said, as he filled both glasses.

"No." she said sternly. "No we don't. Eddie is a bully, and I've handled him before. Besides, I'm pretty sure we've seen the last of him."

"I mean we have to talk about what happened in there."

"Not much to talk about." she frowned. "He tried to grab me, I kneed him in the balls and you know the rest."

"That's not what I mean."

He looked up, their eyes meeting, and she knew he had figured her out.

"Prentiss, I wasn't going to kill him."

"What? I know that, I just didn't want you to get in any trouble..."

"What you didn't want was for me to beat him to death with my bare hands. Isn't that what you mean?"

"I don't know what you're..."

He continued to cut her off.

"You saw what happened with Foyet, you saw how angry I was in there, and you thought I was going to snap. Again."

"Hotch.."

"He had just killed Haley, there was no doubt in my mind that he was going to kill Jack. What happened was the result of months and months of torture and countless dead bodies. He had escaped us, so many times, I couldn't let him get up off that floor, I just couldn't take the chance...that's what I tell myself."

'I know that, Hotch. You don't have to explain it to me, remember, I was there for that whole twisted journey. With Foyet, you did what you had to do, and nobody blames you for it. It was just...seeing you that angry again, it was kind of like a flashback there for a second. "

"Trust me, I know about flashbacks." he said. "I've gone over that moment in my head a million times. In my mind I was seeing bits and pieces of everything he had done, to all the victims but especially to me and my family. I wanted to make him suffer, I wanted to beat him until I could feel the life leave his body."

"Hotch..." she reached out and took hold of his hand without realizing it. "I know what you're thinking. But you haven't turned in to one of the monsters we hunt. It was an isolated incident, and to be honest, if i had a shot at Foyet I would have put a bullet right between his eyes. Any one of the team would have. We all wanted him dead."

There was a lull in the conversation as he looked down at their hands. She suddenly realized what she had done and started to withdraw, but he grabbed hold.

"You know, that's the first time I've ever actually said any of that out loud." he admitted

"Really?" she asked, "What about the FBI psych eval?"

"Well you know," he smirked. "You only tell those people what they want to hear."

She laughed, remembering her own evaluations.

"So...do you feel better?"

He smiled in a way that melted her heart.

"You know, I really think I do." he said. "Thank you."

"Maybe we should thank Eddie." she joked.

'Yeah...no." he laughed.

About that time the waitress came back, asking if they needed anything else. Hotch glanced at his watch. He didn't want the evening to end, but it was beyond late.

"Just the check, please." he answered, then said to Prentiss. " I think it's time to get you home."


	6. Chapter 6

The ride from the bar to Prentiss' apartment was a quiet one, with both of them lost in their thoughts.

Hotch knew that his grand plan had flat out failed. He struggled to keep some distance between them for weeks, and it had all been undone in one night. Everything about the evening had contributed to it. From feeling protective and defending her, to feeling so comfortable that he had completely opened up to her. Something he had never done in his life, not with anyone. He had told her his deepest fears and darkest thoughts, and waited for her to be appalled, disgusted or at the very least judgmental. She hadn't even blinked.

If only things were different. For one thing, there was the general, mostly unwritten rules against fraternization. During his time in the FBI, he had seen many agents that he strongly suspected were involved, and it didn't seem to cause any issues. But the BAU was different. Every time they had a case, they were willfully putting themselves directly in the line of fire. He couldn't be effective if he was constantly worried about Emily's safety. His mind had to be 100% focused on the cases. Something that he had to admit, it had not been in quite some time.

For her part, Emily knew right from the day when they first got reacquainted in his office that she was attracted to Hotch. She never once considered acting on those feelings, in part because of her own insecurities, but mainly because of Haley. First he was happily married, then he wasn't, and then...well when Haley died her only concern was to be there for him as a friend. He was always so emotionally distant that she never once got the idea that he wanted anything more than that. Tonight felt different. She couldn't quite pinpoint when it had happened or what exactly it meant, but something had definitely changed.

When they pulled up in front of the building, Emily was surprised when he got out of the car. She frowned as she reached for the door handle. He held open the door for her and waited.

"Hotch...you don't have to walk me right to the door."

"It's late. I would feel better. And yes, I know you can take care of yourself, Emily. Can you just humor me on this?"

She smiled and nodded slightly, following him towards her building.

"You know," she said casually as they walked, "I was never crazy enough to let Eddie know where I live. Pretty sure I'm safe."

"I said I would take you home, and that means to your door. I'm not just going to drop you off at the curb."

They finally reached her apartment, and she put the key in the lock and turned it. As Emily stepped inside, she turned to see Hotch still standing out in the hallway.

"Hotch? You want to come in for a drink?"

He glanced at his watch.

"It's really late."

"Oh come on, it's Friday night." she teased.

"Actually it's Saturday morning."

But even as he said it, he found himself walking inside. He couldn't help himself. Truth be told, they both had expected him to politely decline and go, yet here he was, standing in her apartment.

"Liquor or beer?" she asked, moving towards the kitchen.

"Whatever you're having is fine."

She disappeared for just a minute, leaving Hotch to look around and take in the surroundings. He couldn't help but notice that, while the apartment had all the essentials, it was lacking warmth. Oh it was neat and tidy, with impeccable decorating, but it didn't feel like a home. He began to wonder if she had ever really set down roots anywhere.

"Here you go. Hope you like dark beer, it's all I have."

"It's fine."

She moved to sit down on the couch. Hotch looked at his feet, hesitating for a moment before sitting down next to her. He had a look on his face like there was something that he wanted to say. She took a drink of her beer and waited for him to start the conversation.

"Emily, I want to thank you for letting me ramble on tonight. It wasn't my intent to burden you with my problems."

"It wasn't a burden, Hotch, that's what friends do." she assured him. "We are friends aren't we?"

"Of course we are."

He smiled when he said it, and the smile melted her heart. She took another drink before speaking.

"So, uh, what a month we've had, huh? I don't remember ever having this many cases in such a short period of time."

He nodded. "That's why I requested that we be taken off rotation for a week. The team is exhausted, both mentally and physically."

"You really think we'll get a whole week without a case?"

"Well, I'm hoping that even Strauss realizes that we're human. We still have to be there, available for consults, but it should be a pretty low key work week."

"I hope you're right."

"So do I. It will give me a chance to catch up with Jack. I feel like I've been neglecting him lately."

"I doubt that he sees it that way. He knows that you're out catching the bad guys, that's what you do."

"I guess." he almost whispered. "Speaking of Jack, I have to pick him up from Jessica's pretty early tomorrow. It's after 2 am... I really should get going." He placed the bottle on the coffee table, standing up and moving towards the door.

Emily was a little disappointed but tried not to show it as she got up and followed him. When Hotch reached the door, he turned to say goodbye, but when his eyes met hers, he was lost. Every feeling, every emotion that he had been trying to control washed over him at once, and he couldn't help himself. He leaned in slowly, brushing his lips against hers gently at first, then with more desperation. Without realizing it, his hand was running through the back of her hair, drawing her closer to him. She felt warm and wonderful and he sighed as he felt her respond to his kiss. He moved away from her lips to place kisses along her neck and down to her shoulders. She tilted her head just a little to give him better access. She was so caught up in his touch, and that's when she let it slip.

"Aaron..." she whispered

Hearing her call him by that name...his first name, was a sudden realization. He backed away from her, his eyes wide. He looked horrified, as if he had just done something terribly wrong.

"Jesus, Prentiss I'm ...I'm sorry I shouldn't have done that."

"Hotch..."

"No...no I...have to go."

He turned away from her, opening the door. By the time he turned back around to face her again, he had gotten himself under control. Gone was the softness and the emotion his eyes, replaced by the signature "Hotch" look.

"I was out of line. It was unprofessional and I promise, it won't happen again."

"But Hotch, wait!"

And then he was gone, leaving Emily standing in the doorway, wondering what just happened.


End file.
